“Five, four, three, two, one, Blast off! “ Smoke surrounded us as we took off into the air. We were moving very fast when suddenly, Julia’s eyes rolled back into her head like a zombie. What could I do? Was she unconscious? She certainly wasn’t responding. My mind was a car, racing cluelessly around a race track. We had now left the Earth’s surface and were zooming around in space. Should I continue to steer the rocket or possibly save Julia’s life? Mind made up, we plummeted back down to earth at a speed of 25,000 mph. Would we make it?
Thursday 15 February 2018
...we were moving very fast... by Lexi
“Five, four, three, two, one, Blast off! “ Smoke surrounded us as we took off into the air. We were moving very fast when suddenly, Julia’s eyes rolled back into her head like a zombie. What could I do? Was she unconscious? She certainly wasn’t responding. My mind was a car, racing cluelessly around a race track. We had now left the Earth’s surface and were zooming around in space. Should I continue to steer the rocket or possibly save Julia’s life? Mind made up, we plummeted back down to earth at a speed of 25,000 mph. Would we make it?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Wow Lexi. This is an excellent use of the prompt and from my perspective, a perfectly written piece. Your use of metaphor brings the anxiety you are feeling to life for the reader and this is emphasised by all the ???
ReplyDeleteFabulous work which I'm sending off for this week's Showcase.
Thanks for sharing,
Jackie (Team 100 WC)
New Plymouth
New Zealand
Exciting piece of writing Lexi, well done. I liked your use of metaphor too - 'my mind was a car, racing cluelessly around a race track'. Really heightens the tension. I also enjoyed your use of rhetorical questioning to add urgency. Well done!
ReplyDelete